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From Trollpasta & Crappypasta
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 Hello, my name is Jerome. I have been a big fan of Shrek since I was a fetus. One day I was blasting This Is America in my car and watching Shrek 1 and 2 (both on at the same time on different screens that I had bought for that exact purpose) when all the sudden something happened. Something BAD. All of my stuff had shut down! So my natural reaction was to yell at the top of my lungs " WHO IN THE CRISPY FRIED FUCK JUST DID THIS!!!". I yelled so loud that the store manager looked over in shock. Then, chills run down my spine... I feel someone pull of my bangles hat and say " I just shit on your car". I feel anger boiling up inside of me, and then, I get thrown out of the car and knocked out. All I remember is Lil Nals X driving away. I woke up in the hospital and reached for my hat, but was greeted with nothing. I found a note on the desk that only said 1 thing, " I stole your hat bitch"... This - is the beginning of a war. When I get out of this hospital, I AM going to take my horse to the old town road... And when I get there and see him with his- well let's just say he ain't gonna ride no more.... Because THAT- was a 2013 Delaware exclusive, and I'm getting it back...- No matter what.....

Nice. lol